Release

You've been stranded in a large body of water. Doesn't matter where, exactly. It doesn't matter how. You're there. Now, let's imagine what this would feel like...

You feel cold. You feel scared. Undoubtedly, you're trying to stay afloat. Your legs are spasming in continual scissor kicks and your arms are flailing. The longer you've been out there...keeping your head above water...your body becomes increasingly wracked with pain. Your breathing is labored and your lungs are on fire.

What would be going through your head during this nightmare? Depending on what particular body of water you're in, you could be wondering if a shark or an alligator is stalking you from below...waiting to make you his lunch. You would probably be thinking about loved ones and praying that you'll see them again. Maybe unfinished business would be on your mind...all the things you haven't accomplished back on dry land. But I'm pretty positive (hypothetically, of course) that your main focus would be on NOT DROWNING. What greater fear could there be than that?

From the time you found yourself alone and floating, your life has been nothing but an effort to survive. Every kick of the leg and every heavy breath has been birthed (either conciously or subconciously) to avoid, or at least to delay, the feared end of drowning. To stop trying would be to be to die. Over and over and over, you forsee your muscles stiffening and your lungs filling up with water; and you imagine how excruciating the pain will be...how long it will take to be over...how much terror you'll leave the earth experiencing. THIS is why you don't stop moving.
Every second of your life; such as it is at this point, is lived in fear. You're so afraid of IT that avoiding IT becomes your lifeforce.

The truth of the situation is that sooner or later, your body is going to give out. Your limbs will be paralyzed from exhaustion and you will go under. Your worst fear will be realized. Yes, it will hurt, and, yes, you will be terrified. Once you realize that it's too late to go back, you will wish that you had kept going...even though your body gave you no choice. But, here comes the good part....after the moment it feels unbearable...it will END. In an instant, all will go black and silent and then your pain will subside. Your fear will disappear and you'll see God when the light starts to return.

We've all been adrift in some ocean or lake or bathtub at one point or another. And we all know the fear of drowning. Our fear becomes our focus and it makes us miserable. It weakens us, hurts us, and makes us sick. And, unfortunately, somtimes no matter what we do...our fear becomes reality right before our eyes, and we can't do anything to stop it.

THEN WHAT?

Then we can rest. There's a physical and emotional release that comes once you know that the worst is over. There's no need to continue dog-paddling and there's nothing else to be afraid of. Your energies can be used for other purposes and you can begin to heal. I think that God often wants us to stop kicking and trust him to end our pain. That ending might bring death of some sort...but he shows us that death is often SO much easier than kicking.

Maybe the worst thing to fear IS fear itself.